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Not Where I Expected, but Exactly Where I’m Supposed To Be

tamara

Whether it fits right into our plans or takes us somewhere we never expected to go, God always places us exactly where we’re supposed to be. ~ Sean King

A couple of months ago I received an e-mail calling for models of all experience levels for the Blush Fashion show from my good friend. In addition to the fashion show raising funds for an organization dedicated to increasing awareness for Breast Cancer (Carrie’s TOUCH), I thought it would be a great opportunity for my sister who has often said her dream is to be a model. I agreed to go with her to offer support. On the day of the casting call my sister caught some type of virus and was unable to make it. By then, I had already told my friend I would be coming to the casting call to support the event and my sister, so I still felt obligated to go (#KeepYourWord).

When I got there, without my sister, they asked me to do a poem to audition for the show. Reluctantly I agreed and was later asked to participate and write a new poem for the show. In addition to work, family, and several performances I was trying to figure out how I would write a poem dealing with breast cancer. To say I had writers block is an understatement.

Then it happened. A good friend of mine’s cancer that started off as breast cancer came back with a vengeance. When I went to visit her in the hospital, knowing that she was on her death bed, she asked me to write a poem for her. That night, I wrote a tribute to her and to people all over the world battling with cancer. She read it, snapped her fingers, and approved it before passing on later that week. This was the poem I was supposed to write. The BLUSH fashion show is the place I am supposed to share it. Carrie’s TOUCH, which my friend was a part of, is the cause my talents were called to support.

The whole time leading up to that revelation I thought I was supposed to be helping my sister get a chance to pursue her dreams. In reality, my sister was a part of God’s plan to put me on stage on May 11 to represent for my good friend.

I do wish my sister had fought off her illness, her fear, and took a step toward her dreams, but so goes life. Insha’Allah/God Willing, on May 11, I know I will be where I am supposed to be and I hope you’ll be there with us.

 

I Won’t Say Goodbye

tamara

…and now that the time has come,
I won’t say goodbye
I’ll tell her to say hello to my grandmother for me
I’ll tell her to let my father know I forgave him years ago
I’ll tell her to give my mother a hug
I’ll tell her that her kids will be just fine
I’ll tell her that I’ll continue shining her light
and telling her story of life
to millions of young women
who need a good example of what a real
woman acts like
I’ll tell her that she is my hero
and that I love her
and that I thank God for giving
us an angel named Tamara

But I won’t say goodbye
because eternity never ends
and love goes on forever
and memories remain fresh
for millennia
and her soul will
continue uplifting spirits
long after her body
quit the race of life
and there is no need for sadness
when a purpose has been served
and God calls us home
to his peaceful arms

I won’t say goodbye,
but I will thank God
for finally allowing her to rest in peace
Rest in Peace my dear friend…
I’ll see you soon…

Fearlessly and with a Smile

Tamara

I don’t see the frail body of a woman
fighting an epic battle with cancer
lying in pain

I see a fighter,
a woman refusing to give up
in the face of insurmountable odds

I see a warrior,
who even in the darkest hour
continues to touch and inspire the souls
of those still needing something
to believe in with her light

I see an angel,
with a bigger than life heart
and a fill up the room beautiful smile
kissing me on the cheek
before asking me in a faint whispered tone,
to write a beautiful poem for her……
…and I heard you Tamara

I don’t see the frail body of a woman
fighting an epic battle with cancer
lying in pain

I see my sister,
a woman of passion
pouring every ounce
of her blood
into the youth
in hopes that she can rescue
at least one child’s tomorrow
from the dark caves of despair

I see my sister,
working
and praying
to give at least one
misguided youth the opportunity
to walk God’s righteous path

I see my sister,
believing
she can help at least one kid
save their dream from the oppression
of hopelessness……

I don’t see the frail body of a woman
fighting an epic battle with cancer
lying in pain

I see a friend of 20 years,
a wonderful mother who has
always been there for her children
no matter what life threw at her

I see a lady,
carrying herself with humility
and grace
illuminating compassion
from her every pore

I see a woman,
of genuine kindness
and love
providing consistent support
even in the face
of her own struggles

I see a warrior,
refusing to be a victim of circumstance
living her life with dignity
a shining example of
how to keep your head up
no matter the challenge
you’ve been called to face

I see a queen,
giving the world
an up close and personal
look at how a woman
can serve as the foundation
of her family
while simultaneously uplifting youth in the community
and fighting her own personal battle
with breast cancer

I don’t see the frail body of a woman
fighting an epic battle with cancer
lying in pain

I see a hero
a role model
a shining example of how
our young women should approach
life…

Fearlessly and with a smile…

All I see is a fearless woman
all I see is a fearless woman
who knows God,
not man
will always have the final word…

God bless you Tamara